Sorrow

All posts tagged Sorrow

Rebel Never Dies

Published January 15, 2016 by atirahjewel

So this is it?
He’s returned to the stars,
The Starman who fell to Earth,
Then sold the world,
To make sure that there is always life on Mars.

God bless the girl who weeps fountains,
For there is no other to compare to her lost hero.
People on the streets would stop an stare at how
He was always dancing on top of the world,
Dancing out in space.

At times it seemed like
The lad was insane,
But he just dared to change his way
Of caring about himself,
The prettiest Star.

The dream of him
Filled us all with the fascination
Of his animal grace
Which, sure enough,
Takes a part of us, when we’re loving the alien.

We wanted him to stay, we meant to say but didn’t,
Now we’re watching him dash away to his bed of dead roses,
And light becomes darkness
As the world is shaken by reality and falls down,
And the stars look very different today.

Now where shall we live,
Since he left us for a new career in a new town?
This is the heart’s filthy lesson;
Big brother has left us to join the Gang,
Something in us dies.

We are the dead and he is our Candidate in a tin machine,
The future legend of the past,
Oh! How we wished he would stay in our lover’s story,
But he was a little wonder, unwashed and somewhat slightly dazed,
Who was looking for satellites.

Now I know it ain’t easy
To hang onto yourself when your cracked actor freaks out in a moonage daydream,
But just pretend you’re walking home when the wind blows.
Keep growin’ up and keep telling lies,
So you can drive through the panic in Detroit.

Then you can live your occasional dream
With your Star,
That wild-eyed boy from Freecloud,
But then you realise you can’t,
Because he’s gone and it’s got us all in a whirl.

10 days after wishful beginnings, 2 after celebration,
Nothing remains and God only knows
How we’re all jazzin’ for the return of the Thin White Duke.
Sunday, everything has changed,
It’s the beginning of the end.

So where the fuck did Monday go?
It went to Sorrow, Pain and Confusion.
It went to Life and Death
And was taken away by Time,
Who was waiting in the wings.

We’re drowning in the memory of a free festival,
So let’s dance tonight from station to station
In honor of the spaceboy who was our hero forever and ever,
So we can be heroes, even if just for one day.
Never let me down, Major, fill your heart with these changes.

Ashes to ashes,
Look back and don’t look down,
And I say to myself,
“Monday’s gone but I promised
To love you ’till Tuesday.”

Hours pass and
The new Angels of promise
Are taking our hot tramp on a brilliant adventure,
A fantastic voyage,
Riding on a golden horse.

5:15, the Angels have gone.
9:25, thank God I’m still alive
I kneel before the grave of the New Killer Star,
With five years stuck on my eyes,
9:26, my Death waits there.

There’s something in the air,
The sound of teenage wildlife,
As they scream like babies
Because they’re young,
Being thrown into the South horizon.

The secret life of Arabia,
Where our kingdom come,
And our king awaits,
Out of this criminal world,
Into his real cool world.

He lies among the stars that never sleep,
They are never far away
So the last thing you should do
Is dream that he has faded from his throne,
Because it’s only forever, not long at all.

He’ll come, He’ll go.
He will lay belief of modern love on you
When he traps you with those beautiful eyes,
And skin is sweet with his musky oil
But he’s never gone.

Go outside,
Look up there, he’s in heaven.
In heaven, but still here,
Because he’s the Rebel
And Rebel never gets old.

Rebel never dies.
Ain’t that just like him?

Copyright © 2016
by Atirah Jewel

And So It Ends

Published December 31, 2015 by atirahjewel

After all this time,

I’m still lamenting the absence of wings on my back.

I’m still tortured by the truth of being where I am now,

Not being where I was

Or where I’d like to be.

Though time is moving and jumping forward,

I’m still struggling with my inability to turn it backwards.

And yet, I know I can’t.

I’d dream a dream so beautiful that after all these years,

I couldn’t help but cling to it.

And now I know,

And now I’m finally realising,

I have got to give it up.

And so it ends,

And so it’s over.

This is me saying goodbye to my tragic fantasy,

And saying thank you to all of the wonder it filled me with.

I’m gone and so is she.

And I’m sorry, my love,

But she’s gone and she has to be.

My heart is breaking off into shards,

I’m drowning in this ocean of tears,

My hands are shaking in pain and fear,

I’m dying within myself,

I want to hold on,

I want to wake up to my darling dream,

But now I know,

And I now declare,

No matter how much hope and wish and try

To bring this bliss back,

It’s already dissolved into me.

And so it ends,

And so we end.

I’m sorry, my sweet love,

I’m sorry, my holy dear,

But she’s gone.

She’s gone now.

And so it ends.

The End.

Copyright © 2015
by Atirah Jewel

W

Published February 27, 2015 by atirahjewel

When the sadness is gone,

Will I know how to dream?

Weep for me,

Withering to nothing in this darkness.

What will become of my bones?

Why can’t I feel myself?

Watching my life dissolve by,

Wondering why I can only fall.

When am I going to find the strength to cry?

 

Copyright © 2015
by Atirah Jewel

Changes

Published October 21, 2014 by atirahjewel

We’ve come to a turning point,

A place where we are made to move on

From where we are now.

A wonderful new opportunity,

To grow, to evolve,

From whatever it is we now are.

And yet,

I wish we didn’t have to leave this place.

I wish we could stay here and live,

Like we have lived for so long.

That whatever change is approaching,

Is but a dream I am dreaming.

Because here, time exists at a standstill;

Not ever really moving or changing.

Here is a place draped in feelings,

And with memories existing in

Every scent, every corner, every glance.

Because of these that have always been,

I am able to recreate my

Most recent years and thoughts.

To make myself feel the same as I once did,

As I sat in the same place I do now,

Giving the unhealthy illusion no time has really passed at all.

I am trapped inside an asylum of mind,

And no matter how much I focus on making new,

Old memories lurk against every wall,

And are attempting to be relived,

Because here, nothing is ever different,

Here, nothing is moved.

Here, I am able to remain that little girl I once was,

In love with the idea that nothing ever has to change.

And that is exactly why,

In these moments passing,

And in the future to come,

Nothing can be allowed to remain the same.

 

Copyright © 2014
by Atirah Jewel

Isabella

Published May 9, 2014 by atirahjewel

In a plagued Heaven,
Perhaps I can exist without
Constant thought of Death
Looming over my mind,
With no other reason
But to threaten my Sanity.
Alas, in this palace-like place,
I am caught even more in the web
Placed under the spell of Death’s beauteous charms.
Falling, tumbling, soaring,
Living in my own personal, tainted Heaven,
Forced to accept the sweetness
Of Death’s Mercy,
Though I weep for
Being prey to a Mercy
That should not exist,
Not like I exist
For in the weak existence
I am subjected to live.
It does not truly exist
On the Grand scale of things.
No,
Not like the existence of the Sun,
The Moon,
The Earth;
Whose own place in the realm
Of Life and Honesty
I begin so greatly to question.
Why should I believe
In a place
Where Hatred and Truth combine
And aimlessly murder the life
Once awarded to the Father,
The Son,
And the Mother,
Perhaps her more so than the rest.
Isabella, the face of Beauty,
Forgiven from her.
The face of the ocean
And the birthing force of
All that is Mighty and Holy.
Isabella, she fades,
Fades into the black eternity
That she is so cruelly betrothed to.
See her, dancing.
Feel her, falling.
All of the twists and turns
She encounters along the way
To find her inner sanctity,
Her own Heaven
Plagued heavy with Shame,
Fear and Guilt.
Once more we fall apart
From where we once lived,
From who we once knew.

Isabella is dead,
Finally, graciously.
Isabella is dead.

Copyright © 2014 by
Atirah Jewel

Should Death be so sweet…

Published February 20, 2014 by atirahjewel

Should Death be so sweet,
As to come take me away,
To ring my bell, nice and proper,
I should go with this sweet Death,
With an air of exceptional sweetness myself.
And should I go,
Ever so politely,
With this Death so sweet,
I would dress in my finest garb,
And don my Tuesday hat.
I would kiss my wife goodbye for me, darling Death,
And Death would take my hand,
Sing me soft melodies,
Whilst watching the world weep on their shoulder,
And I, bid farewell to this tragic life.
But this, of course, might only happen,
Should sweet Death,
Ring at my door.

Copyright © 2014 by
Atirah Jewel

Engel

Published September 9, 2013 by atirahjewel

Sweet child of mine,
You took my hand,
You took my flesh,
And now the sky refuses to smile at you.
Murderous.

You watch as the darkness falls,
The only light you will know,
But instead of tears,
You produce a smile.
Relentless.

The wounds you have caused,
Scars that will never heal,
You fly on your broken wings of withered dreams,
And sing good-bye to all the angels.
Odious.

Copyright © 2013 by
Atirah Jewel