Quickly, Swiftly…

Quickly, swiftly,
The body decomposes before it’s in the ground,
The wounds that once dripped blood now seep with pus.

Deeper, lower,
The ground falls as the grave is dug,
The grass that once flourished green is now but a mound of dirt.

Heaviest, darkest,
The night sky becomes as the corpse is tossed in the ditch,
The heart that once beat proud and strong is now just a stone.

Moved, determined,
The hand the works to refill the ground becomes,
The shovel that once lay dormant is thrown back into use.

Quietly, softly,
I creep from the seed I planted,
The ground that once lay undisturbed shall now bloom with lilies.

Copyright © 2013 by
Atirah Jewel

Silentium

Silence forms in beads around my neck,
Tightening it’s grip until I’m just clinging on the edge of the cliff of life,
My fingers slipping,
A slow descent down,
I am falling, drifting,
Dear Lord who art in Heaven,
Hallowed be thy name,
I beg you save my soul from damnation,
As my body be expelled to my grave,
Eternal rest laid in my arms,
The shallow grave I’m given,
Only an enemy be my company,
My murderer,
My demise,
My dearest friend,
Silence.

Copyright © 2013 by
Atirah Jewel

Dreaming of Happiness

I hurt myself,
Just to hear the screams,
I kill myself,
Just to feel the pain,
Just to taste the blood as I drown myself in it,
Fallen to my knees in agony,
Withered up,
Dying,
All I can think to do it laugh,
Laugh, just so I can cry out more.
I’m obsessed with the idea of pain,
With the idea of death,
With darkness and decay,
The rot of flesh as it decomposes under the sun,
Unknown to any,
A woman,
Shriveled up and bleeding out until the minute of her demise,
A man,
Being the subject of torture as he begs for mercy,
Cold-blooded slaughter,
Unsuspecting victim,
It amuses me so,
Wishing I could be there with them,
Watching them wither and die,
Glimpse death as he takes their hand in his own icy grip,
Pray to be next.
Laughing forever so at these thoughts,
Fallen away to my own world,
Savouring each moment of my death,
Joining the victims of so many,
Pain was the last thing I felt.
Dreaming of happiness.

Copyright © 2013 by
Atirah Jewel

The Tree

T’was such a beautiful day,
I thought unto myself,
So I decided to go for a walk,
To further appreciate the day,
For in this life I had so few,
On my walk,
I happened upon an old tree,
It’s branches had been stripped bare by the season,
Leaving it vulnerable and exposed.
The trunk had been defiled by two set of initials,
Carved deep into the bark,
The pain those imbeciles must’ve caused the tree,
My whole body quivered with anger,
I had to close my eyes to calm my nerves.
When I opened them,
I let their gaze fall elsewhere.
To the bottom of the tree,
To the roots.
The gnarled, knotted, twisted roots,
They protruded from the soil,
As is the dirt that once surrounded them had been torn away,
Leaving them to be exposed as well.
They almost looked like women,
Women who were left bare,
All piled atop one another,
They looked as if they were calling out in agony,
Desperately pleading for their lives,
Waiting for someone to help them.
If you truly listened,
You could hear their screams,
Riding on the howling wind.
How real it all seemed,
How loud they sounded in my mind,
I caught myself imagining they were real women.
Shaking the disturbing image from my mind,
I walked on.
I came across several more interesting trees,
Each having a story of its own to tell,
I saw several birds and streams,
Heard many calls of wild beasts,
But my mind kept wondering back to one place,
Those roots.
Those helpless women.
The image was disturbing, yes,
Yet I could not help but be intrigued,
My feet moved on their own,
And I sprinted back the the tree,
The fascination consumed me.
I looked on and thought,
“These women, if I cut them,
Would they bleed?
Would they cry out in pain,
Or beg for my help and mercy?”
I closed my eyes once more,
When I opened them I stumbled back in horror,
For a brief moment,
They ceased to be made of wood,
They were human, living and breathing,
Pained.
I resolved to come back later,
When everyone else was gone,
So we could be alone.
When later presented itself to me,
I gathered myself and went back,
An axe slumped over my shoulder,
A test for her,
To see if she would scream,
To see if she would fight,
To see if she would bleed.

Copyright © 2013 by
Atirah Jewel

To Lan

The lines you have written,
Have spoken to me,
Telling me that the beauty in your soul,
Radiates with the light of one thousand suns,
All of the stars that sprinkle the night sky,
Could never even begin to compare,
To the brilliance of your shine.

With this hand, I write to you,
Pondering what words to use,
To speak to you.
How could my silly phrases possibly reach you,
When I lay upon the ground,
And you are stationed above the clouds?

Your words sing Utopian songs to me,
Racing ahead of the rest,
You dance with Beauty,
Yet you lie with Darkness,
You are the mistress to a poet,
A poet I once knew.

Higher rising you are,
On your wings made of gold,
‘Till you sit atop the Sun itself,
Finally letting it bask in your brilliance,
And shining through my darkness,
With your light.

Yours Truly,
Atirah

Copyright © 2013 by
Atirah Jewel

Engel

Sweet child of mine,
You took my hand,
You took my flesh,
And now the sky refuses to smile at you.
Murderous.

You watch as the darkness falls,
The only light you will know,
But instead of tears,
You produce a smile.
Relentless.

The wounds you have caused,
Scars that will never heal,
You fly on your broken wings of withered dreams,
And sing good-bye to all the angels.
Odious.

Copyright © 2013 by
Atirah Jewel

Hello Again, WordPress World.

Dear Readers,

Some of you might have noticed, most of I’m guessing didn’t really care but I have obviously not been very active on here as of late. My last post was months ago and this has been my first time signing in since. But really, it was Summer, so that means I’m excused right?

Anyways. Autumn is fast upon us which means I will be using my mobile phone a lot less and the desktop computer a lot more (or using my phone the same amount but just use the desktop more 🙂 ). In short, I will start being more active once again. Maybe not this month but soon I will be posting a lot more works and much more frequently than this past year. This poetry blog has been a place for me to share and vent for these past couple of years, not using it so much this past year of 2013 has taken it’s toll on me and has made me realise even more that this is definitely not just a blog.

So hope you all had a brilliant Summer and pleasure to be back!

 

 

 Sincerely,

Atirah Jewel

A Love Story

The passionate love story,

Of the Moon and the Sun,

So far apart yet still so in love,

The hot Sun burns with passion for his Moon,

The radiant Moon shines with love for her Sun,

All through the day, all through the night,

They long for each other,

But no matter how hard they try,

They can never grow closer,

Except when the Sun is setting and the Moon is rising,

And for a brief moment, the two lovers share the sky,

Lighting up the sky with the colors of their love making,

Passionate, intense, fulfilling their desire for one another,

But of course, the Sun must go,

Giving the Moon the sky all to herself,

Letting night blanket the sky,

Alone she cries her glittering tears,

She longs for him,

Much like how I long for you,

So here, under the moonlight,

Under the light of a woman suffering in love,

Take me,

Be my Sun, make me your Moon,

Let us make our own love,

Love me until the lovers of the sky are together again,

Hold me until sunrise,

When they make love once more,

Then suffer with the Sun as I suffer with the Moon,

Until the time comes when we can briefly share the sky once more,

And color the world with our love.

Copyright © 2013 by

Atirah Jewel

A Dream

Oh my love,

Your beauty saddens me beyond compare,

It takes my breath away,

And makes my heart ache,

Because I know,

To me all you will ever be is a beautiful dream,

Good-bye,

Good night,

I can only dream your dream will be as sweet as mine.

Copyright © 2013 by

Atirah Jewel

Wingless

As I gaze in the mirror,

Something in my eyes,

Makes me want to cry,

As if I can see my own soul for the first time,

And what I see,

Makes me want to cry,

What I see is not ugly,

Nor is it something that should bring me sorrow,

It just reminds how limited I am,

Oh how I wish I had wings to take me somewhere,

Somewhere else from here,

My reflection looks back at me,

Tears glistening in it’s eyes,

As if it sees my soul like I see its,

In this endless aching of my heart,

I blindly wish for wings,

Not realizing how they will be the fall of me.

Copyright © 2013 by

Atirah Jewel